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If a man does his best, what else is there?
Let him who takes the Plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
Every nation has its war party. It is not the party of democracy. It is the party of autocracy. It seeks to dominate absolutely.
The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work.
I invented the term Object-Oriented, and I can tell you I did not have C++ in mind.
I have yet to meet a C compiler that is more friendly and easier to use than eating soup with a knife.
Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.
The worst crimes were dared by a few, willed by more and tolerated by all.
Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.
The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently
I don\'t believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
If all the world\'s managers were laid end to end, it would be an improvement.
[War] might be avoidable were more emphasis placed on the training to social interest, less on the attainment of egotistical grandeur.
If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.
Future historians will be able to study at the Jimmy Carter Library, the Gerald Ford Library, the Ronald Reagan Library, and the Bill Clinton Adult Bookstore.
Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.
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If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
It\'s not that I\'m afraid to die, I just don\'t want to be there when it happens.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.
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Where humor is concerned there are no standards - no one can say what is good or bad, although you can be sure that everyone will.
The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.
The company doesn\'t tell me what to say, and I don\'t tell themwhere to stick it.
Descended from the apes? Let us hope that it is not true. But if it is, let us pray that it may not become generally known.
O\'Toole\'s Corollary of Finagle\'s Law: The perversity of the Universe tends towards a maximum.
I have spoken many a word, therefore, it is fact.
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies.
The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work.
Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.
I\'m not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president.
I have an existential map; it has \'you are here\' written all over it.
Fill what\'s empty, empty what\'s full, and scratch where it itches.
He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.
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Either he\'s dead or my watch has stopped.
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If the brain were so simple we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn\'t.
Never test for an error condition you don\'t know how to handle.
Because I do it with one small ship, I am called a terrorist. You do it with a whole fleet and are called an emperor.
All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door.
I don\'t pray because I don\'t want to bore God.
I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure -- that is all that agnosticism means.
Guard against the impostures of pretended patriotism.
Only a free and unrestrained press can effectively expose deception in government.
Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.
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All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You\'d be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.
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If people can judge me on the company I keep, they would judge me with keeping really good company with Laura.
Minsky\'s Second Law: Don\'t just do something. Stand there.
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A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.
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The cry has been that when war is declared, all opposition should be hushed. A sentiment more unworthy of a free country could hardly be propagated.
Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.
The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?
To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me.
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A pint of sweat, saves a gallon of blood.
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If you\'re sick and tired of the politics of cynicism and polls and principles, come and join this campaign.
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There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
Beware of computer programmers that carry screwdrivers.
I have yet to meet a C compiler that is more friendly and easier to use than eating soup with a knife.
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Patriotism means to stand by the country. It does not mean to stand by the president or any other public official...
Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
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Physics is not a religion. If it were, we\'d have a much easier time raising money.
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If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can\'t it get us out?
I\'m trying to see things from your point of view but I can\'t get my head that far up my ass.
The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows.
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It\'s strange, isn\'t it. You stand in the middle of a library and go \'aaaaagghhhh\' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.
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Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics.
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Sex is like air. It\'s only a big deal if you can\'t get any.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.
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Instead, I was a painter, and became Picasso.
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C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.
It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man.
Under conditions of competition, standards are set by the morally least reputable agent.
Emulate your heros, but don\'t carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.
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A pint of sweat, saves a gallon of blood.
Emulate your heros, but don\'t carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.
The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same.
My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you\'ll be happy; if not, you\'ll become a philosopher.
Early to rise, Early to bed, Makes a man healthy but socially dead.
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Before the war is ended, the war party assumes the divine right to denounce and silence all opposition to war as unpatriotic and cowardly.
Real life is that big, high-res, high-color screen saver behind all the windows.
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If you take something apart and put it back together again enough times, you will eventually have enough parts left over to build a second one.
The bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of an expanding bureaucracy.
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Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
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Nine out of ten doctors agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot.
Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?
Where humor is concerned there are no standards - no one can say what is good or bad, although you can be sure that everyone will.
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Object-oriented programming is an exceptionally bad idea which could only have originated in California.
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In this war ? as in others ? I am less interested in honoring the dead than in preventing the dead.
The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.
A man can\'t be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
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Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny.
Cholesterol is your natural defence against excessive circulation of blood, which can carry venoms, poisons and other toxins around your body.
Experience is what you get when you were expecting something else.
Outside of a dog, a book is man\'s best friend. Inside of a dog, it\'s too dark to read.
There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend the whole.
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But at my back I always hear Time\'s winged chariot hurrying near.
Sex is like air. It\'s only a big deal if you can\'t get any.
Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure.
A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.
Descended from the apes? Let us hope that it is not true. But if it is, let us pray that it may not become generally known.
Give me chastity and continence, but not yet.
I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.
Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
Intellectuals solve problems; geniuses prevent them.
University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
Attention to health is life\'s greatest hindrance.
If quantum physics doesn\'t confuse you then you don\'t understand it.
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I have four children which is not bad considering I\'m not a Catholic.
Experience is what you get when you were expecting something else.
Hofstadter\'s Law: It always takes longer than you expect, even when you take into account Hofstadter\'s Law.
The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.
An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.
Deliver yesterday, code today, think tomorrow.
It\'s strange, isn\'t it. You stand in the middle of a library and go \'aaaaagghhhh\' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.
Don\'t sweat the petty things, just pet the sweaty things.
The trouble with the Internet is that it\'s replacing masturbation as a leisure activity.
Machine. Unexpectedly, I\'d invented a time
A terrorist is someone who has a bomb, but doesn\'t have an air force.
Happiness is good health and a bad memory.
Support your local Search and Rescue unit -- get lost.
Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called \'Ego\'.
All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You\'d be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.
Some men, in order to prevent the supposed intentions of their adversaries, have committed the most enormous cruelties.
We need either less corruption or more chance to participate in it.
When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.
Fill what\'s empty, empty what\'s full, and scratch where it itches.
To err is human -- and to blame it on a computer is even more so.
Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called \'Ego\'.
Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?
What a cruel thing is war: to separate and destroy families and friends, and mar the purest joys and happiness God has granted us in this world; to fill our hearts with hatred instead of love for our neighbors, and to devastate the fair face of this beautiful world.
I\'ve had a wonderful time, but this wasn\'t it.
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I don\'t know why we are here, but I\'m pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves.
Science is what people understand well enough to explain to a computer. All else is art.
The trouble with the Internet is that it\'s replacing masturbation as a leisure activity.
The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.
Misunderstandings and neglect create more confusion in this world than trickery and malice. At any rate, the last two are certainly much less frequent.
Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.
If Al Gore invented the Internet, I invented spell check.
Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.
If it wasn\'t for muscle spasms, I wouldn\'t get any exercise at all.
Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.
Of all the enemies to public liberty, war is perhaps the most to be dreaded because it comprises and develops the germ of every other.
Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.
Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact.
The difference between \'involvement\' and \'commitment\' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was \'involved\' - the pig was \'committed\'.
Build a man a fire, and he\'ll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he\'ll be warm for the rest of his life.
Many a man\'s reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.
Three o\'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.
I agree with the reforms, but I want nothing to change
We\'ve all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.
There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend the whole.
We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.
I have an existential map; it has \'you are here\' written all over it.
Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proven it correct, not tried it.
In America, anybody can be president. That\'s one of the risks you take.
Everything that can be invented has been invented.
A hen is only an egg?s way of making another egg.
Maybe this world is another planet\'s Hell.
Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.
Should array indices start at 0 or 1? My compromise of 0.5 was rejected without, I thought, proper consideration.
Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
Those are my principles. If you don\'t like them I have others.
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It\'s the transition that\'s troublesome.
I\'m not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.
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If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.
Everybody\'s worried about stopping terrorism. Well, there\'s a really easy way: stop participating in it.
The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.
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Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.
When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.
Ah, you know the type. They like to blame it all on the Jews or the Blacks, \'cause if they couldn\'t, they\'d have to wake up to the fact that life\'s one big, scary, glorious, complex and ultimately unfathomable crapshoot -- and the only reason THEY can\'t seem to keep up is they\'re a bunch of misfits and losers.
First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said \'no\'.
After every \'victory\' you have more enemies.
Object-oriented programming is an exceptionally bad idea which could only have originated in California.
When I die I\'m going to leave my body to science fiction.
How much time does it take for 1mg. of ativan to leave my urine?
Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
Why don\'t they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff.
A good sermon should be like a woman\'s skirt: short enough to arouse interest but long enough to cover the essentials.
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All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You\'d be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.
Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.
That is the saving grace of humor, if you fail no one is laughing at you.
In this war ? as in others ? I am less interested in honoring the dead than in preventing the dead.
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I have yet to meet a C compiler that is more friendly and easier to use than eating soup with a knife.
To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me.
The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn\'t get bigger or heavier.
If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God?
When ideas fail, words come in very handy.
It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one\'s doubts.
I Can\'t Think Of Anything Reasonable To Counter Your Argument Or Don\'t Have The Least Inkling Of The Subject So I Will Resort To Name Calling And Hope I Can Get Away With It.
Subtlety is the art of saying what you think and getting out of the way before it is understood.
Look at you in war. There has never been a just one, never an honorable one, on the part of the instigator of the war.
Where humor is concerned there are no standards - no one can say what is good or bad, although you can be sure that everyone will.
A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.
After every \'victory\' you have more enemies.
Silence is argument carried out by other means.
Ah well, then I suppose I shall have to die beyond my means.
My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn\'t take it out of my garden.
I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
Under conditions of competition, standards are set by the morally least reputable agent.
The competent programmer is fully aware of the limited size of his own skull. He therefore approaches his task with full humility, and avoids clever tricks like the plague.
Military glory -- that attractive rainbow, that rises in showers of blood -- that serpent\'s eye, that charms to destroy...
Everything secret degenerates, even the administration of justice.
I don\'t even butter my bread; I consider that cooking.
Louis Pasteur\'s theory of germs is ridiculous fiction.
Argue for your limitations, and sure enough they\'re yours.
I don\'t believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
Sex is like air. It\'s only a big deal if you can\'t get any.
A model is done when nothing else can be taken out.
For if he like a madman lived, At least he like a wise one died.
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Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do.
Don\'t sweat the petty things, just pet the sweaty things.
When you hear hoofbeats, think of horses, not zebras.
He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.
The covers of this book are too far apart.
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.
Minsky\'s Second Law: Don\'t just do something. Stand there.
Democracy is where you can say what you think even if you don\'t think.
最終更新日 : 2012/01/21/(Sat) 16:30
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